I'm the girl who tries to be perfect but it all comes to a disaster.
I was told that,
"Wanting to be perfect is the start of all disasters because the world isn't perfect either"
I heed and nailed down those words.And now I love being imperfect.
Imperfections makes me unique and above all I learnt from my mistakes.
At the end of the day, things will just pass by very smoothly
and I know I'm always protected by God.
I won't shy away to admit that I always gets into trouble and made wrongdoings
because of my own mistakes and carelessness.
I may look decent and all but god knows how many times I've got
myself into real deep trouble. Yup *gulp*
Sometimes it can be quite intense and stressful to always have
to portray a good- mannered, decent, well- behaved, respectable, vigilant, responsible and all kinds of good things a human being could possibly hold.
It's not easy. It has never been easy.
Especially when you hold a title as a 'Teacher'.
You will hear things like, "A teacher shouldn't be doing all this"
"She's a teacher. How could she be possibly do that?"
"Teacher this.....Teacher that....Teacher, teacher, teacher, it's all your fault"
Of course, I feel cooped up at times.
I feel I can't be real, the really real self of being me.
Like there's too many restrictions.
And hell yeah...over the years I've restrict myself A LOT.
By nature, I'm a happy- go- lucky person, spiritual, jovial, adventurous
and hates confinement.
But I guess over the years and situations changed my characters.
I miss being that old being.
I can't say being an educator has bring it all down...
Being in the education line has taught me a lot and build
positive characters that I never knew I have.
In other words, its beneficial.
Well, I need a change. I'm going to do it for
myself and not for others. Unless I can pass it all through la...then
I'll go *phewwwwww* at lasssstttt.
And talking about imperfections,
I'm glad I'm in good terms with the ex which I damn before.
Haha..I'm good, he's good.
We should have just decide to be friends and not more than that.
The best thing is, he admits his mistakes and he accepted my imperfections
like he has known me for long.
It's nice to know that the feeling of hatred or hating or anger is gone.
See, we could really talk to each other
and I noticed he's been different.
He's becoming more like a man and talks like a man.
I hope he continues to be more mature haha.
And maybe one day, I'll just accept his invitation to his wedding
and be happy for him :)
